Go to jail go directly to jail....

....do not pass go, do not collect $200.

This post is for all of you who are wondering what kind of things Rex and I have been up to. (And I think jail stories are funny)

My part in the whole process is very simple. When the inmate first comes in, I check their vitals. If they need labs, I draw those (my favorite part!) I am the standby for any exams on females. I bandage wounds and those sort of things. But mainly, I get to listen to all of the complaints of the inmate.
The number one request: "Doc, I'm feeling anxious, uneasy. Can ya give me something for my nerves?". Ummm, no. You're in jail. People get anxious here.
The inmates have to fill out a form listing their complaint if they want to be seen by the doctor. My favorite so far is the guy who said he needed us to take his feet off. (He had some other issues too...)
There is the woman who has no health care so she keeps getting arrested for the medical care. Right now she wants a hysterectomy. I don't think we'll be able to work that out.
There was an itchy guy who heard voices, a guy with a tumor in his jaw who thought he had tmj. There was the gnarly broken hand, the face which collided with hand that broke, guy who branded his own leg and MRSA, MRSA, MRSA.
There was the lady who couldn't stop moving her tongue outside her mouth. Was she supposed to be on meds? Yes. Did she know what they were. No. Could she call someone to get her meds. Well, she doesn't know any numbers. Hmmm.
There was also the girl who called my husband every name in the book. (Even a couple unique ones). She'll be talking to her lawyer. (Sure...) And that was all over a benadryl.
I'm sure there were a few others that I'm forgetting. But that at least gives you an idea of what we've seen. Every week as we leave, I look at Rex and say the same thing, "wow, never a dull moment. "